foolish mistakes, but whatever, they are all mine.
Mostly-cis, fat ,middle aged, bisexual, disabled, white femme. My hobby is seeing how many years I can add to my collection before I die.
Posting will be random but may contain fat acceptance, wool, and cats, lagomorphs and corvids in no particular order. Posting may also be sporadic as I have ME/CFS and a bunch of other stuff that makes me tired and some times crabby.
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(trigger warning: discussion of domestic violence) Recently, Charles Saatchi was photographed assaulting his wife, Nigella Lawson, at Scott’s Restaurant. He is shown grabbing her by the throat – he has now accepted a police caution, so there’s no need to caveat this with “allegedly” or the like.
The media furore has quickly turned not to the events in the restaurant, nor the issue of domestic violence, but predictably and boringly to the reaction of high-profile figures to the story. And one of those figures is the Deputy Prime Minister, Nick Clegg. Nick was asked on his call-in show what he would have done if he had witnessed the assault, and gave a reply which has been criticised as stumbling and insufficiently condemnatory. He’s been pressured to issue a statement clarifying his views.
What’s interesting about the statement is that it doesn’t actually answer the question he was asked in the interview, which is what he would have done if he’d witnessed the assault. His stumbling answer was trying to honestly answer the question. And the honest answer is that most people witnessing that assault would have done nothing – particularly if it was over before people had time to react. As the lovely Jennie points out, the bystander effect means that attacks in large crowds are surprisingly rarely challenged, and it’s hard to condemn the witnesses of an event you didn’t see for acting naturally.
It’s not a citizenship test. I don’t know why this bothers me as much as it does, but I get so goddam irate when I hear politicians, media, everyone calling it a citizenship test and no one challenging it or correcting them.
I’m not quite sure how well my experience generalizes, so I’ll just tell you how it worked for me. As a non-EU citizen marrying a British person, I got a spouse visa. This was stressful, expensive and sucky in itself, but I won’t go into it here. The visa lasts for two years, and you’re responsible for having the next thing in place by the time it runs out.
The next thing is called Indefinite Leave to Remain. You send off an application with all kinds of bank statements, bills proving you both live in the same place (this is their idea of proving you’re still married), photos of both of us, my passport…oh yeah, and a lot of money.
Up until a month or two before I needed to pay it, the fee had been something like £350. When I did it, they’d more than doubled it to £750. This was about a month’s income for me, and a lot more disposable income than we had at the time, and it made me stressed and angry and crazy. But what can you do? They know they have a captive audience. It’s not like you can go to the other British government down the street and get a better deal.
And you have to send a pass score from the Life in the UK Test.